WE ARE TRYING TO RESCUE 12-YEAR-OLD GIRL WHO IS PREGNANT
Bell and Bridge Crystal Foundation, an NGO whose concern is to rescue girls made pregnant as well as embark on enlightenment campaigns in the FCT and Nasarawa states. In this interview with Jamila Nuhu Musa, Stanley Onyekwere and Zainab Kandi, said how they plans to counsel young girls on sex education and dangers of early pregnancy to their education. Excerpts:
Tell us about your foundation’s activities
We have a seminal/enlightenment tour, to visit secondary schools in the FCT and Nasarawa state, and talk to them on girl child and teenage pregnancy because the rate of teenage pregnancy in Nigeria is spiraling upward and if we don’t talk to these children or fight this issue now, it would be a serious problem in future. So in order for these children to be useful to themselves and the society, we intend to educate and enlighten them accordingly.
Tell us about some of the cases you are handling
One of the cases, is on the issue of a girl who is barely 12-years old, but who is eight months pregnant, she will be 12 years in September; so you can imagine when she got pregnant, at age 10. When I tried to interrogate her, she was crying and told me there is this uncle that lives in their neighbourhood, whenever she has a problem or there is an issue, it is to the uncle she goes to, and then on this day he started touching her here and there, and it happened.
We want to make provision for these children to have thorough counseling where their self-esteem can be built, their psyche can be worked on and see how we could get them back to school again because when a child is pregnant, she is suspended from school, and this stigma, shame, and the disgrace does not allow the child to go back to school. What happens to the destiny of that child? It is ruined and destroyed; so we want to create an opportunity where the children will be thoroughly counseled when they are pregnant or after delivery, to go back to school and get back their future. We have to make the children understand a new phase of life they are in now and help them to put their future in order.
Are there cases of teacher involvement in child pregnancy?
No, I have not had a case like that, I know we have victims, but the children sometimes are not bold enough to tell you what actually happened. They are so ashamed that they don’t want to mention the ‘uncle’ or the person that is involved in it, but I know we have a lot of victims that are 11, 12 or 13 years as the case may be.
How many victims have you identified so far?
We have about 15 victims.
Were all the victims molested or raped?
No, they are different cases! Some are not raped, and majority of cases are as a result of ignorance. A lot of them are ignorant not knowing what to do that is why we want to incorporate the sex education thing.
How do you think children should be counseled, educated, on the films they watch and magazines, novels they read which pollute their minds?
At this point, I think it’s the duty of parents to watch and observe what their children do. That’s why when we are through with the children, we will go on air and talk to the parents. Over 90% of the job should be done by parents like monitoring what children watch and read. Sex education has to be incorporated in every home, when you have a female child you don’t have to wait for the child to turn 20 before you talk to her about sex. When a child is 10 years as a matter of fact, that child is an adult and she should be enlightened on this.
There is the culture of silence where parents find it difficult to talk to their children about sex. How can one deal with this problem?
I understand that a lot of families or cultures have different orientations but we have to rely on what is important for the children. If you say: ‘this is a child, she is too little to hear things like this, as little as she is she gets into something bigger than she can handle, and gets pregnant. So if she is expected to marry and have sex, she should hear it before time. That’s why we have to talk to the parents and before you know it, their ideas about things like that will begin to change.
What is the health situation of the pregnant child, and are her parents involved in this?
According to her, she left home after she discovered she was pregnant. her parents don’t know where she is. I was able to talk to her on phone because she called me from a call centre after she heard about my programme. I convinced her that our foundation would help her, take her to the hospital for ante natal, her delivery, as well as rehabilitate her. But she is so afraid, so ashamed. She has been crying and asking, “what if my mum hears about it”? I am still trying to talk to her. She has not been going to the hospital, no proper care, no good food, and no roof over her head. She sleeps wherever she thinks is safe. I told her, how do I help you when you are still hiding? There are many of such girls who can’t come out and tell you what their problems are.
How are you going to encourage her to go back to school?
She is not in school and may not be educated unless something is done to help her because when I asked her if she intended to go back to school, she said no! That she can’t bear the shame. But this is a new phase in her life and she has to understand the situation she is in. Others too have same perception – a lot of them when they call, they say, ‘No I won’t go back to school, what will I do in school again? My friends, how will I face them? Teachers are also not helping the situation as they use such girls as an example. You have to work on their psyche because they are emotionally drained. So counseling is the first thing; without it you can’t get them to know how to deal with their problems.
How are you going to ‘unveil’ the ‘uncle’ who got the girl pregnant in the mentioned case?
Unveiling the ‘uncle’ is not an easy task. It has to be through the child, we have to be able to make her talk and reveal who and what actually happened. To her, he is still a good uncle after what he did to her, because this uncle has given her a lot of gifts, made her feel like, whatever your problem is I will solve it for you. And he did this in her neighbourhood, under the roof of her mother. So we have to be able to make her speak, for now she still sees him as a “good uncle” and since he is a good uncle she will not want to implicate him that is the challenge
How do you get funds to run the foundation?
I have written to government agencies for assistance but yet to get any response, still, with the problems on our hands we have to forge ahead; work must go on. We can’t leave these girls to their fate.
The most important challenge we face is funding. We want government agencies to support us financially and partner with us to see how we could make this project a success and impact positively in the lives of these children. We have to all sit up and make it our assignment, not only that of Bell and Bridge Crystal Foundation.